All I ever wanted to be was an artist, when I was a kid… it wasn’t so much the impressions I got from others about my work as it was the impression I got from myself. I could look at what I had done and know without doubt that I had made something to be proud of.
I hated myself because I was different. I didn’t look different, but my increased sensitivity to people, places and events made me stand out like a sore thumb among the stronger of them.
At age 16, I discovered drugs and found everything I had been missing. It was confidence around large groups of people, it shut them out somehow and I was able to function.
Heroin, and meth were absolute necessities by the time I was 19 and that went on for four years until I finally got pulled over on a DWI and everyone was just done giving me chances to straighten up.
Suffice to say that, as of this year (2018), it has been 13 years since my last use.
When I got out of jail, I had two things on my mind, meth and the Bible. I got hooked up with a church and they found me to be a light among them. I had never felt so accepted by so many in my life. That made the bible win out.
I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 disorder at age 23 and prescribed heavy doses of meds for it. The surprising thing was, the meds worked for me.
I went to a workshop on meditation a few years later. The workshop was taught by a psychic. I was in awe of her and her abilities and so it was a shock when she seemed to take a special interest in me. I had never had anyone tell me I was special, myself, and definitely not gifted.
“You will go on to touch the lives of many many people, Taylor.”
I went home that very day to practice and it was just like when I was a kid again with my artwork. I was accurate with this. This meant I had purpose somehow. I didn’t know how yet, but all the thoughts I had been having about doing drugs those past couple of days melted away in an instant…
His name was Bob, and Bob was black. He was my spirit guide, and he was here to help. He wasn’t alone though. Over the coming months, hundreds of spirits showed up to see what they called “new light.” Anyway, the fact was, I had a lot of faith and I had seen these things before my very eyes that confirmed what I was seeing and feeling in meditation.
For years, every day, sometimes I would talk to the spirits for 2 or more hours. Their messages were of love and peace and they told me it was alright to believe in myself, something I desperately needed at the time.
I would find validation as I read my bible after my morning meditations. Something a spirit said or feelings I got would come to life before my eyes in the bible. I could therefore reconcile the two, but coming from a strict southern Baptist upbringing, I had a conflict of faith for a couple of years. I am, in many more ways, happy that I pressed on in this despite what the bible may or may not call an “abomination.”
I tried out for my first psychic hotline in 2011 and made the grade. I couldn’t have been happier making 30 cents per minute. I was doing what I loved. Time went on, opportunities to grow came up.
I had been in school to study finance, which was boring the hell out of me. Once I did the calculations, however, in just a few months, I had managed to clear the salary of an accountant.
That was when I quit school and focused on this as my career. I’ve had a lot of ups and downs but I can say without doubt that I love my job and the work I do.
There’s a very talented artist in Texas by the name of Vincent Falsetta. He said to me one night, “Taylor, what you are doing is an art.”My respect for him as an artist brought tears to my eyes when he said that. Here I was living my childhood dream, apparently.
I love my work and as long as it is around, I don’t think I will do anything else.